All Forums > SimLeague Hockey > Theme Leagues > Kingston Crooks MLD Team Thread
3/19/2009 7:07 PM
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3/31/2009 3:59 PM
Kingston Participates In League Outside The MLD
(AP- Tank Heavens)

Yes you read the header correctly. The MLD's infamous Kingston Crooks took their "show" on the road a few monthes ago when they signed up to participate in another WifS hockey league. Diehard Crooks' fans hammered local sports radio shows with their calls, complaints and concerns. Questions of why Kingston management would do such a thing were asked almost daily. Why put an unneccesary extra workload on team and risk exhausting players and having them succomb to injury?

Our calls to the Kingston management team were not immediately returned but that didn't stop this star reporter from getting the inside scoop. I managed to get an exclusive interview with Kingston coach Mr. Puck by following him to a local strip club after practice.

I pulled up a chair and sat beside him on perv row and proceed to ask him the question on everyone's mind. Here is the transcript of my conversation with the coach.

(Tank Heavens) Why was there a need for Kingston to participate in a league outside the MLD?
(Mr. Puck) To be honest, it wasn't my idea. And believe it or not, it wasn't those money hungry suits up in the front office either. It was the players who requested it.
(TH) The players? really? Care to ellaborate?
(Mr. P) Yeah sure. Awhile back, one of the guys came across this ad for an upstart league that promised to be a rough and tumble injured filled league. It certainly got everyone's attention and before we knew it, team captain Jude Brandt brought the idea to my attention at a team meeting.
(TH) And you went along with it?
(Mr. P) Well, to be honest, I didn't think it was a good idea, but those money hungry suits were all over the idea as soon as they heard about it.
(TH) That's strange, you'd think they'd be concerned about the health and wellbeing of their team?
(Mr. P) Are you crazy?!? All that those gold diggers were thinking about was fattening their wallets with all the extra revenue and publicity the Crooks organization would get from all those extra home games.
(TH) Makes sense I guess.... but what I don't understand is WHY would the players want to do this, play so many games. Especially taking into consideration the recent success that they have enjoyed in the MLD with a recent Cup win and having back2back 100+ point seasons.
(Mr. P) That's similar to how I felt about the whole situation. They explained it to me though and once they did, I understood where they were coming from.
(TH) Care to explain it to me?
(Mr. P) Sure. But only if you can lend me a 20 so I can spend some time over there in the VIP area.
******I handed Mr. Puck a $20 bill at this point******
(Mr. P) Thanks man! Lucky for you I am a man of my word. Well to answer yer question. The players, although happy to be enjoying some recent success, seemed to be missing the old Kingston Crooks' antics and rough style of play. They saw this as a chance to have some fun, beat some people up, have fun and beat some more people up.
(TH) I guess that is understandable.
(Mr. P) You bet your *** it was, thats why I allowed them to go for it. I even started supporting them by not making them practice for games within that league. I just wanted them to concentrate on the rough stuff.
(TH) So how did they do in that league?
(Mr. P) Well, they did very good at concentrating on the rough stuff, like the normally mellow Crooks' D-man Seth Nurmenheimo who surprisingly led the entire league with 1416 PIM!!
(TH) 1416 PIM!! Holy crap!! are you serious?!?!
(Mr. P) I *censored* you not...... however as a team, points and performance-wise, we didn't do so good. We finished the season in last place with an embarassing 34 points.
(TH) You have crappy seasons just like that in the MLD too, remember?
(Mr. P) Hey shut up, don't mention those seasons. I've tried to block them out because they are....
(TH) they are part of history, you can't change history!
(Mr. P) Listen here you worthless reporter, If I say not to talk about something, don't talk about something.
(TH) Wow, sounds like someone is in denial.....
(Mr. P) Wow, it sounds like this interview is over...... thanks for the $20, but don't you ever follow me again or I will get Golmorblood to pay you a visit.....and you don't want that

At this point, Mr. Puck got up, grabbed two ladies and head behind the curtain to the VIP area.

Well there you have it folks, the inside scoop. I was so intriqued by the coach's comments on this endeavor that I am going to dig up some Kingston stats from this league. Stay tuned.
3/31/2009 4:32 PM
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6/3/2009 10:04 AM
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All Forums > SimLeague Hockey > Theme Leagues > Kingston Crooks MLD Team Thread

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