I was surprised that Dirk had not been drafted in the last three $52M Drafts. Hope he works for me.

I was never very good in these back when I was commish, so don't expect much change.

I am as clueless as a blind man in a blizzard.

Glad to be back.

Should be fun.

Evals a-coming?

we've heard it all before

Posted by copernicus on 8/20/2021 12:45:00 PM (view original):
we've heard it all before

Everything has been said but not everyone has said it.

Posted by longtallbrad on 8/20/2021 3:26:00 PM (view original):

Posted by copernicus on 8/20/2021 12:45:00 PM (view original):
we've heard it all before

Everything has been said but not everyone has said it.

In conclusion as President Roosevelt so eloquently stated
"we have nothing to fear but total defeat"
or as Tiny Tim once said
"GL everyone!"

Team Rosters

Copernicus - Chris Paul, Draymond Green, Zach LaVine, Marcus Camby, Alonzo Mourning, Zion Williamson, Jarrett Allen – I like this team but am troubled by inefficient spending that left me a smidge north of 20,000 minutes and that’s all I will say about my own squad

Sappy - Wilt Chamberlain, Steve Nash, Klay Thompson, Andrei Kirilenko, Derrick Favors, Paul Millsap, Mitchell Robinson – some good parts, good efg, a little bit of everything but doesn’t feel like a 52m team – falls into the age-old trap of picking The Stilt and still coming up short on the boards? These new kids, this Mitchell this Favors kid? What do they do? They shoot real good but do they know how to play the ball game in the classic style? Do they rebound even? WIlt gives you a 3rd of what you need, the other 4 guys just have to come up with the other 2 - what is 4 guys divided by 2/3s? it is not too much, it is not difficult

Hoopsdude - Giannis, Bob McAdoo, Donyell Marshall, Delon Wright, Andre Iguodala, Jon Barry, Thomas Bryant – similar to above: some good pieces but at this cap shouldn’t there be more punch (esp. since Johnny is likely only good for 30mpg)? Some D, Some 3 but at this cap, I need you to pour Everclear on my head and light me on fire – I’m just not feeling the burn - this one is only lukewarm , only 10,000 scovilles

redbooda - Nikola Jokic, Shawn Marion, Domantas Sabonis, Enes Kanter, Jamaal Murray, Jeff Hornacek, Andre Miller – I mean who cares about defense anyway? This squad will probably go on to inspire a children’s book called The Loneliest Little Matrix about a young boy named Shawn who always finds himself alone on one end of the schoolyard while all his friends are standing over there on the other end with that friendly elderly fellow that everyone calls "The Professor' only it turns out that the professor doesn't really work at the school and supposedly he has a restraining order so maybe he shouldn't even be there.

mikee1 - Stephen Curry, Shawn Kemp, Tyson Chandler, Walt Frazier, Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, Eric Moreland, Marvin Bagley – some jagged edges here, nice blend of O and D, and inside and outside but kind of incomplete I think – is Bagley a small forward? Who is the small forward? – I see 4 starters and some bench players – did someone take all your money? Were you accosted? Someone stole your small forward, didn't they? You can tell us

jackedjamie - Michael Jordan, Dikembe Mutombo, Andre Drummond, Chris Boucher, Mikal Bridges, Jason Terry, Cameron Payne – I mean defense and scoring and some 3-point shooting and rebounding or whatever? I feel like you’re not even trying, so vanilla, so last Tuesday – I give it a 5 out of 7, that’s like 71% - I’m really good at math

dontburnearl - Shaquille O'Neal, Bill Walton, Jrue Holiday, Terry Porter, Serge Ibaka, Paul Pressey, De'Anthony Melton – this team thinks it has threes but it doesn’t have as many threes as it thinks it has – but what it does has is D and E (for efficiency I suppose?) and, also P (which is for passing, except for Serge who nobody on the team likes because he does not share) so that’s nice – I give this one 4 stars out of 12 but on an inverted scale so that’s 82% - do a Boban or a Greg Oden in Shaq’s back 8 and you’re going to be pretty scary

pharrop - Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Julius Erving, Michael Porter, Mike Conley, Bill Russell, Darren Collison, JaVale McGee – So it’s 3 all-time top 20 legends and some guys – do they have to have a separate locker room for the normal human beings? Does Mr. Russell sometimes break up scrimmages by pointing at the opposing goal and saying, ‘hey JaVale it’s that one’? There is so much gravitas here and then just some guys none of whom should be playing SF btw

ysw128 - David Robinson, Nikola Vucevic, Anfernee Hardaway, Eric Bledsoe, Jose Calderon, Oscar Robertson, Greg Oden – first of all, so much for my idea to put that Greg Oden season as backfill behind Shaq. Second why the f-? are you drafting a 1.1m salary dude? Why not grab Roy Tarpley while you’re at it? Am I taking crazy pills? Isn’t this the 52m league? Anywho, this is one of those squads where I go rd 1: sure rd 2: yep, makes sense rd 3: uh oh look who is sliding, nice catch! rd 4: totally makes sense rd 5: huh rd 6: !!??

vancem - Dwight Howard, Kyrie Irving, Paul George, Derek Harper, Montrezl Harrell, Joel Pryzbilla, Brandon Clarke – totally sensible-looking team - not sure I love the last two ‘mortar’ guys but still totally makes sense to me which is probably not good news for you

gerryred - Karl Malone, Damian Lillard, Bam Adebayo, Tom Boerwinkle, Kenneth Faried, JaMychal Green, Rodney McCray – we typically play the game with two guards which I guess one of them is Rodney? Does anyone remember Scooter though? No one ever remembers Scooter he and Rodney were on a stacked Louisville Cardinal team led by Doctor Dunkenstein they won the whole deal. This team is stacked like that Cardinal team maybe if they only have to play against Kiki Vandeweghe/Mike Sanders lead teams they will do well

seapilots - Rudy Gobert, Dwyane Wade, Chauncey Billups, Jonas Valunciunas, Kyle Lowry, David West, Marvin Williams – this team has a number of guys on it, many of whom are good at basketball. If your intentions were to field a squad of players, many of whom are good at playing the game of basketball, you have succeeded – very danceable, I give it a 3

amerk1180 - Anthony Davis, Scottie Pippen, Ben Simmons, Jayson Tatum, Tree Rollins, Jaylen Brown, Emeka Okafor – why do you hate letting other teams score? Who hurt you?

tarheel1991 - LeBron James, Elton Brand, Bobby Jones, Khris Middleton, Jerry Lucas, Baron Davis, Marquesse Chriss I really like playing either Elton Brand or Bobby Jones at SF to leverage position available rebounding, I like playing SFs like Middleton and Bron down to guard for the same reason – I guess the right seasons here together plus Jerry make around 90 drb%. are those the ones you used? I guess we will never know….

HDS1 - Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Hakeem Olajuwon, Rajon Rondo, Troy Murphy, Lonzo Ball, Joe Ingles – so much chowder, pale, pasty Boston chowder, so chowdery I need a bread bowl – but hey you’ve got a couple ex Lakers! anyway how about you write some damn evals, man? heavy weighs the crown and all that ****

thomcat - Kevin Durant, Artis Gilmore, Deron Williams, Buck Williams, Pascal Siakam, Kyle O'Quinn, T.J. McConnell – I do not see any clinkers here and yet I am less than enthused and I cannot say why – the numbers are the numbers and they are very good but Buck and Artis just seem like such an old school lunch pail kind of situation and whatever happens do not let KD handle his own social media feeds!

albiband0 - Kevin Garnett, Jason Kidd, Joakim Noah, Carlos Boozer, Clyde Drexler, Dan Roundfield, Nicolas Batum – this team would be unbelievably great about 10 seasons ago, you have really nailed that retro feel – this team is so retro that it doesn’t know that half its members are going to be dusted in the snap, this team isn’t worried about anyone finding out about their trips on Jeffry Epstein’s jet, this team just heard about MGMT, this team is so retro that it thinks a pandemic is some place in a mall that serves fake Chinese food. In short this is a very 2017 kind of team, I think it could go all the way

reeldeal01 - DeAndre Jordan, Karl Anthony Towns, Larry Nance, Gary Payton, Charlie Ward, Mark Price, Arvydas Sabonis – I feel like any two of those guards and then maybe somebody else instead? I don’t know, I never know, which is why I usually screw up my drafts – I overthink it, I mean I like who you have but aren’t there some other dudes who take a bunch of threes at a really high rate? Not Mark Price 20 per kind of rate more like a big boy 40% situation? A lot of dudes on your squad take 3s but do they really mean it?

6theluckyone - Charles Barkley, Hassan Whiteside, Manu Ginobili, Amare Stoudemire, Maurice Cheeks, Andrew Bogut, Otto Porter – what I said about albiband0’s team goes double here but I think yours is better but maybe it’s because of all that glittery EFG

ncih - Dennis Rodman, Magic Johnson, Brent Barry, Joel Embiid, Dirk Nowitzki, Kris Humphries, Greg Anthony – ok but I don’t love your team’s high usage piers for this cap – like a combo Dirk/Joel handcuff kind of works for one of them but what else you got? Plus what I said about KD’s socials goes double for Earvin, he is one of my all-time favorites but every time he tweets, Christ.

midge - John Stockton, Tim Duncan, John Collins, Robert Parish, Richaun Holmes, Robert Williams, Jameer Nelson – what is this you are putting in front me? This is like, what? John Stockton and 5 PF/Cs and Jameer? I don’t think I like this – everyone is talking about John Collins? What does he do? Let’s see – he’s like Bobby Portis but less punchy – I don’t know – seems sketchy - I give it full marks

longtallbrad - Luka Doncic, Moses Malone, Mookie Blaylock, Patrick Ewing, Kyle Anderson, Robert Covington, Jusuf Nurkic – this team has a lot to like and I could talk about that but instead I will complain about my experiences trying to use Luka in the sim, I don’t know what it is but it just doesn’t work for me. I never never never get the numbers – throughout the history of the sim I have seen guys who have the sexy numbers prove again and again to be sim poison – for me that is him, I can’t say why, it just is (also one simply does not do Robert Covington AND Kyle Anderson; it is one or the other, never both)

samuelyork93 - James Harden, Ben Wallace, Jimmy Butler, Horace Grant, Thaddeus Young, Al Horford, Bobby Portis – I am so exhausted at this point, this is so difficult I can barely keep my eyes open but here we are so let’s do it – um Harden? See also: Luka – very sexy numbers but I just can’t with him plus he as a basketball player he ranks right at the bottom of my all-time favorites (which is the opposite) – you could pick all the basketball players ever and rank them first to last favorite and of all my favorites he would be the very last – he’s gross – I think it is his beard – but not as a person I am sure that he is a very nice person (weellllll....?) but just his game – I can’t

rjk2781 - Kawhi Leonard, Clint Capela, Victor Oladipo, Christian Wood, Nate McMillan, Jamaal Tinsley, Gerald Wallace – stout defensive squad with a very bits and pieces feel for which I will have to give an incomplete because aside from Clint’s 26-28 minutes I have no idea who is in your big man rotation (or at least I hope for your sake I don’t)

Nice copernicus. Are we doing that thing where everyone in the league except for the guy who won it writes evals?

what's the other option?

How about if someone wins the league and doesn’t write evals they have to pay $100 to anyone named copernicus or Midge?

If it makes you feel better I hate Harden IRL too!!

I bet if you look deep enough you could find some six year old macaroni and Jimmy Hoffa inside that beard.